The Lies We Tell Ourselves 1/5/2025

By: Jennifer Richardson Holt

Apparently, the new year hasn’t done much by way of refreshing my mind with new and interesting topics. The things that are currently in my mind most right now are all the typical commentary that one hears at the beginning of the year.  There are the usual announcements of people who insist they’ll do things differently this year.  My favorite (she writes with as much sarcasm as she can muster) are those who loudly proclaim they aren’t going to make any resolutions. I have always found the proclamation that you are going to keep living your life as you always have a tad anticlimactic.  I am not sure what sort of response these announcers would be going for.  Maybe they just wanted to be someone that has something to say despite the fact that they really aren’t saying anything at all.  Anyway, in these first few days of this new year I have witnessed people being very, well, people-esque.  Allow me to explain.

We’ve all seen the resolutions and the anti-resolutions.  This is pretty standard fare. The thing is though, for the most part, the things people post on social media are attempts at reflecting themselves in the best light. Now, we do know those extra special folks who will post any and everything to float on the internet for perpetuity despite how unhinged it may make them seem. However, for the most part people try to paint the most positive, if not enviable picture possible. I think we expect that for the most part.  It is a tad on the hilarious side though to see those folks who are attempting the same resolution for multiple years in a row.  It’s funny but, if most of us are honest, the humor is at how relatable it is.  This is the type of thing that is intriguing to watch; people and their natures however, if I’m honest, while new year’s social media posts may have been what started my last few days of human observation mode, it isn’t what has kept me there.

It was a strange combination of a couple of reality television shows and their characters that got me noticing how people work. I know what you’re thinking.  Jennifer, reality TV is actually not particularly realistic. I promise you dear reader, that I am in fact aware of this and while I know reality shows are fluffed up story lines to add to the entertainment factor, I found it interesting that two completely and utterly different shows were broaching on some topics that are a bit of a touchy subject for me. While watching both of these shows I was very fired up because the mindset being shown by these characters was sadly, not just extreme examples for good TV.  That is what grated on me to no end. These asinine ideas are agonizingly present in today’s society, and I am going to go ahead and apologize now that you’re going to have to hear me possibly rant on a popular ideology that so many people have taken to as of late.

Both shows, while from wildly different angles, were taking a look at a person’s individual spiritual beliefs.  The qualm I had was this. One character had lost interest in his faith in the sense he used to be more devout yet now, any renewed interest was on his own terms. It sounds feasible enough except for you don’t get to redefine a faith to make it fit your standards. That ceases to be a faith system.  Those are just a few pastime activities that you do for fun.  Especially if your faith system involves a higher power, seems to me it would be pretty stinking obvious that one cannot reinvent said being to make sure that they are exactly to one’s standards. I mean if I get to decide what my higher power thinks, likes and dictates are they even higher?

Unfortunately, it only takes the most passing glance at any slightly spiritual commentary these days to know this is probably a majority approach. The second show I saw was a reality game show and one person who was doing well in this game who openly spoke about their spirituality was ridiculed to the hilt, even to the point of knowingly spreading false rumors to make him look bad. And why were those surrounding him hostile?  They were angry and called him false, a liar and a manipulator because he wasn’t doing what they wanted that benefited them. I’ve even seen a few entertainment news articles discussing how viewers were disgusted with this guy’s manipulation. I have screamed at the TV and my phone about this. He didn’t do anything but claim he’d make his decisions by prayer. People lashed out and called names and even others apparently who watched the show felt the same.  It is completely infuriating that so many feel this way. It’s silly probably but if I came across some of those spiteful show contestants I would, well…I probably wouldn’t do anything since I so all I can to avoid conflict, but I’d darn sure think some confrontational things and have a very disgusted face.

This is where so many people are now. Truth or even their faith is not rooted in reality or even in tradition, but solely in what makes them happy and comfortable. I just want to shake people. That isn’t how any of this works! If your religion or deity can be altered to suit your comfort zone, then it is imaginary.  If a pretend faith is what you were looking for, though not really sure why you would, then I guess good job to you. These days everyone and their grandma throws around the ideas of praying or believing in God. The thing is, if you’re going with that belief then you have to go with who He is. If I can create my own version of Him that always agrees with me and keeps me snug and comfy in my own self involvement, then did I really even need to bother with Him?  I mean a higher power should be, oh, I don’t know, HIGHER?!?

I’ve gone off on a tangent as I feared that I would. I’ve rather enjoyed watching the wildlife around these days because people just tax me too much. Nobody wants to put in any effort for anything. That goes for relationships, jobs, accomplishing goals, or even generally being a decent human. No, no, apparently a large portion of people feel all the luxuries and conveniences should just be laid in their lap and anyone who has the gall to expect any sort of real commitment, hard work, ethics or integrity is just a meany. What is True and Right and Good never promised anyone constant comfort or effortless ease and if anyone tells you otherwise they do not know of what they speak. I just wish more people than I’m seeing lately would get a tight grip on that.  But, maybe the effort of a tight grip (even if it is on reality) is far too much to ask these days.