Off to the Side 7/17/2022

By: Jennifer Richardson Holt

I have a recommendation. It is a very strong recommendation.  I truly believe that if you do what I am about to suggest that your life will be at least somewhat better. Now, before you think that I have gone to writing self-help material, hear me out. Also, the thought of me attempting to produce anything that could be called self-help is probably one of the most laughable concepts I have ever considered. If you fine folks had only seen my life, I assure you that you too would cackle like a rabid hyena at the thought of me trying to be a guru of self-improvement.  Now, I do however have the aforementioned idea I would like to share and not because I am some sort of clever so-and-so, but I feel strongly about sharing it because I know from experience it works.  I know this in the same sense I know that dessert is tasty. Such things do not take a genius only experiences.  I do feel like I need to say that my recommendation isn’t some newfound wisdom. It’s actually pretty old advice but, for some reason, I felt like it bore repeating and so I shall.  We all know this world is a dark place.  There are things to be sad, scared, angry, worried or disappointed about forever in the forefront of our vision. However today I want to suggest that you check your peripherals.

First off, if you have the distinct misfortune of watching the news then you are most assuredly bombarded by all forms of negativity. One of the worst things about what we call journalism today is that they seem to have discarded the idea of reporting facts and will even go so far as to make up their own stories if it gets them more views. Sure there is plenty of the awful for them to pull from for content and they are more than happy to put that all front and center because it sells. But today I am telling you to take a different approach. Now, certainly do not ignore front and center. Often it is important and we do need to be aware of the goings on of our world. But, I think it is very often just as important, if not more so, to look to the side.  Around all the terrible things there are so many good.  Even in tragedy there are those that come to restore and rebuild. Yes, sometimes they are hard to see.  They do not get much by way of publicity because it isn’t what draws interest. But it should be.  And really you don’t even have to look to the vast events to find little side views worth seeing.

I was at home the other day doing nothing particularly fascinating. My daughter had wrapped herself up in a blanket and was rolling about like a soft, 6-year-old filled burrito on the floor. In playing with her, I stood over her and tucked my feet beneath her and did some sort of strange movement (which I have yet to be able to recreate) which jostled her about. For whatever reason she found this absolutely hilarious.  Her laughter was intoxicating, even when it got so hard it became punctuated with snorts.  I grabbed my phone to video it. Now, in dimmer moments, I watch that video and things brighten. It was a small rather mundane moment which could have easily gone beyond my focus.  I am thankful this little side view caught my eye.

This past weekend I was on the lake with my family and the family of a friend of mine. On the back of the boat we were on there was the genius arrangement of seating that basically became a large lounging bed.  The mothers and daughters all lounged luxuriously here looking out at the water or at others riding a tube behind the boat.  We weren’t really doing anything at all; nothing worth paying close attention to.  But the tranquility that was brought to look out on the water and how the huge clouds came billowing up from the tree line was something to behold.  There were even puffs of smoke like steam coming out of the forest where temperatures fluctuated from the rainstorm that had just passed. My mother always said they were from the cooking fires of rabbits as they made supper. To see these forest wisps and have warm sun and cool breeze mingle on skin made me smile. I made a mental note of it and it’s a little something I can pull from when stress rears its ugly yet ever-present head.

The other morning I was putting on my makeup in my bathroom.  My cat had come up on the sink to closely observe my procedure.  Whilst applying my makeup he affectionately rubbed both the left hand holding the tube as well as the right elbow of the hand raised to my eye.  Yes, this did in fact cause me to apply mascara to areas that most assuredly were not lashes.  But I certainly couldn’t be angry whilst the deep rumble of purring was casually leaned against me and a tail was wrapped around my arm.  I had a busy day ahead of me but, in taking in this miniscule peripheral moment, the stress of it was dulled a bit.

I know, all this could possibly sound silly to you. Maybe paying attention to this type of thing isn’t some deep meaningful activity. But it is oh so necessary!  We have all heard the phrase “it’s the little things”, but do we realize that sometimes we will have to make a special concerted effort to see those little things?  The world is very happy to shine a neon flashing light at the big, bad headlines.  I think it is so vastly important though that we pause, flip to the pages further back in the paper of life. Find the human interest stories or maybe even a comic strip.  You won’t find such things that lighten the heart in the big, bold print.  You’ll have to search them out but they’ll be there waiting, off to the back and around the edges, in a font that looks like hope.